Ask A Woman Why Are Women's Restrooms Nicer

Hey there, Rachel. I feel like I know you because you’re on the site. I was wondering if you could answer my all-time girl question:

Is the women’s restroom that much nicer than a guy’s restroom, and if it is…why?

Thank you, and good job on the site - you guys are funny.

-Tyler

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Dear Tyler,

Thanks for your kind words. A lesson to all readers, blatant flattery is DEFINITELY one way to get your question answered. A bouquet of bacon roses would also do the trick.

As for your question, I had to really examine the fine print on my woman card before I was even able to consider answering. I think I might be blurring the line a bit, but I want you to know how committed I am to journalistic excellence, and will offer my observations.

While I have not yet found that women’s bathrooms are significantly better decorated or more frequently cleaned than men’s bathrooms, I still do believe that women’s public restrooms are nicer than men’s public restrooms. Here’s why:

1. Women Sit Down And, Therefore, Have Better Aim

Now, I’m not accusing you of anything, but you have to admit that some other guy who came before you missed the mark and now there’s a nasty lingering stink. This also is less true if the women’s room doesn’t have those paper toilet seat covers, causing many women to squat. Most women are excellent squatters, but like the men - there’s always that one…

2. Women Don’t Have Urinals, And Therefore, No Urinal Cakes

Urinals don’t smell nice, or fresh, or clean - they just smell like port-a-potties.

3. Women Don’t Fall For The Cheap-Perfume/Cologne-in-the-Vending-Machine Trick

That cologne is designed by people who want you to fail. It is truly terrible, and will only succeed at ending your conversation with the pretty girl you were talking to prior to your bathroom break. The wafts of stale, gross cologne definitely take points off the men’s room.

I feel pretty good about my conclusions, but your question has inspired me to do a bit of investigating. Look forward to a more thorough report in the future!

Until next time,

Rachel

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